How White People Pronounce “Turmeric”

Tremor-risk?

Term-ick?

Turnt-it? (I heard that on Drag Race!)

Turkey-sandwich!

Tall-half-caff-pumpkin-spice-oatmilk-latte!

(Intermittent-fasting-brain-fog-fit)

Oh yeah, how do you pronounce that spice again?

Tamarind?

T-(gurgling noises)-c?

Two-demerits?

Terminate-Eric? (Sorry bro, but TWO demerits?)

Terminator-Blu-ray-disc?

The-Titanic!

Tomb-Raider-pit?

Terminal-asterisk?

Temporal-rhetoric?

Turn-of-the-century’s-literary-influence-of-the-esoteric?

Turn-U.S.-measuring-units-to-metric?

Turned-traitor!

Tur-’merica! (Imperial system of measurement 4EVA!)

Turn-back-time? (If I could find a way/I’d take back those words that have hurt you/And you’d stay)

Toad-the-Wet-Sprocket-hit?

Ohhh-Stevie-Nicks!

T-(murmuring)-k?

Matthew-Broderick?

Matthew-Broderick!?

Matthew Broderick.

Originally published at https://www.robotbutt.com on January 11, 2022.